It’s been a long and rough week for your mother and me filled with a lot of what I like to call “skirmishes” – mini-arguments and fights – culminating in a full-blown fight or argument.
I can just be a nicer person overall, particularly to your mother in times of my own emotional turbulence. If I could just share an aphorism from your grandfather: think of your loved one as a wood plank, and whenever you get in a fight with a loved one, think of it as hammering a nail into that wood plank. One might be able to reconcile and remove that nail, but the hole will still always be there. I suppose put enough holes in a plank and it’ll eventually break.
I don’t think it is my place to say or share, but I do want you to know that your mother has been going through some mental turbulence through her pregnancy and breastfeeding journey – whether it is postnatal depression or hormonal imbalance is impossible for me to know. We talk about it sometimes, but she just continues to power through and is such a great mother to you and partner to me.
We’ve always kept an eye on you during these disagreements and arguments. It’s hard to tell what you think or whether you even notice because you’ve generally just carried on with playing with your toys and putzing around, but perhaps you are simply distracting yourself from the unpleasant energy in the air. Who knows.
In any case, your mother is good about pausing the argument and wanting to pick up on it after you’re asleep or something. I, on the other hand, can be considered a hothead with no patience and wanting to get into it regardless of your presence despite knowing better.
I know your mother and I will always work to resolve any differences or issues. It just might be a bumpy ride along the way sometimes! I am sorry.