I never would’ve considered your mother or myself as couch potatoes because we enjoy a nice long hike as well as runs along the canal. I also never would’ve considered either of us exhibiting addictive personality behavior. But I can’t deny our run of TV-watching marathons, which demonstrates that both of us are prone to addiction and couch potatoes.
We are like werewolves. Normal humans during the day – we will meet friends for lunch, walk around the city, do some work at a cafe, and as of late, try to get Kili to go potty outside – but once we’ve cooked dinner and plopped ourselves down in front of the TV for “just one episode”, something happens and we find ourselves there for the next five hours of the night. The only time we break is for the bathroom (although your mom gets so enthralled with shows she often forgets her bladder is even full) or a popping-popcorn break. Even the introductions of the show become an annoyance and get in the way, so I’ve perfected the art of skipping the exact duration of each show’s introduction (FYI, most cable shows have a ~90 second intro while network shows have a ~12 second intro).
The worst is when we are watching a series that is already complete so the only thing restraining us from carrying on to the next episode is our (nonexistent) self-control. Netflix also hasn’t done us any favors by releasing entire seasons in one go nows. The third season of House of Cards? We binged through it in one weekend.
Neither of us can help how exciting some of the TV series we watch are. In the past couple of years, we’ve whipped through:
- The Wire (five seasons, ~12 episodes per season @ 50 min per episode)
- Orange is the New Black (two seasons, 13 episodes per season @ 50 min per episode)
- House of Cards (three seasons, 13 episodes per season @ 50 min per episode)
- How I Met Your Mother (nine seasons, ~20 episodes per season @ 20 min per episode)
- Game of Thrones (four seasons, ~10 episodes per season @ 50 min per episode)
- Modern Family (six seasons, ~20 episodes per season @ 20 min per episode)
- Newsroom (three seasons, ~10 episodes per season @ 50 min per episode)
- Better Call Saul (one season, 10 episodes per season @ 50 min per episode)
That comes out to 33 seasons of TV, 505 episodes, and 16250 minutes / 271 hours / 11.3 days of our lives. To put this in context, your mother and I have been together for three years, which averages out to about 15 minutes of TV per day we’ve been together. So if you’re ever wondering why we say you’re only allowed to watch 15 minutes of TV, this is how we’ve decided on that amount of time. .